Hedwig Dreams

Relocation of my site

2007-12-30T19:07:28Z

Just wanted to drop a note that I am relocating my site, "Hedwig Is Dreaming". The site is still available through the address www.hedwig.is.dreaming.org, but if any of you have bookmarked the page, you should update the bookmark.

And a Thank You to Ziphoid who kindly has offered me hosting. You are so nice :-)

Christmas time...

2007-12-20T22:57:42Z

It is time for christmas once again and this will be my last post before christmas...

Christmas, given my current situation is not all jolly... but still I think this will be a better christmas then the last few years... And the christmas presents... I managed to get a few sorted out, not completely satisfied with them, but well... they just have to have some understanding for me being sick...

And yes... I am still sick... I wish I could get well NOW... Not only do I REALLY wanna get back to work... I have feeling exciting things wait for me in the new year and I want the opportunity to be able to fully enjoy them...

And... what else... IRC... hehe... I do enjoy... and I have gain some admirers ;-)... enough for the time being... I quite satisfied with the turnout of being on IRC so far... Have met some nice ppl there... *smirks*

And I really enjoy skype... :D

But, yeah... I do look forward to the new year... but I think I will get to you about that in an other post... preferably around new year perhaps ;-)

So... I guess there is one thing left to say:
Merry Christmas you all, and to all a good night...

And hugs for all on my f-list :-)

Just some text I wrote...

2007-12-16T22:49:57Z

I was going trough my old writing and I found some stuff worth publishing... In mine opinion anyway... I put one up at Hedwig Is Dreaming. And there is the other one I don't know what to do with... I found it kinda funny thou... And for your amusement (hopefully) I will post it here...

And for the record... This has never really happened to me in this way... But I was speculating one night...

What can happen when frustration comes over you

Build up
The phase when you start talking to people and realizing how nice they are. You haven't done that in a long time. You really feel like playing and laughing again... You really really feel like playing.... right about now... And then you get frustrated...

Provoking
To warn people you tell them about your frustration, perhaps in a more or less obvious way... People wonder what you mean... People say it can't be that bad... People say: "Give me your best shot"... You are basically screwed...

Riot is coming... take cover...
Right about now the little demon inside of you has broken loose and is feeling really hungry.. You close your eyes saying "not him, not him, not him" and if you are lucky you steer the Beast away from the person you actually like enough to care about...

Massive mayhem
By now your inner demon has chosen it's pray... or the pray has chosen you, depends on who provoked you... Then it sort of jumps on the pray and start feeding on it...

It usually looks like something like this:
- AHA... PRAY!!!
- Yeah, I believe it when I see it...
*jumps on, kissing the living life out of pray*

What happens after that depends:
A. The person is stunned and don't know what happen...
B. Pray likes and provokes more...

A.
Person is stung, don't know what the hell happened, and do not do nothing more then just... "oh, oook..." demon seems a bit contend, smiles and goes back to you smirking... will do this again soon...

B.
Pray smiles back and says... yeah, this is nice... massive making out takes place and evening ends with both partners leave for home feeling thirsty for more...

B. They meet again...
Pray seems to enjoy this... want more... demon not satisfied... they meet again and make out some more... and then some... and then... ehm... this is going to hell...

B. Trying to wake up...
Waking up in the morning... hopefully alone (C)... wondering what the hell happen last night...

C.
You stumble up... sit in front of the computer... Open your favorite IM... and the pray perhaps wishes you good morning...
Ok... this is... ehm... Spend day looking into thin air...

D. Oh shit... I didn't go home...
Where the hell am I... What the hell happened... Who is that and why are all my cloths on the floor...

But hey.. you made a new friend...

Trying to get on with life...
You get on with life... going to your job monday morning hopefully not all to staring at thin air... In time life will go on and not tempt you so much... yeah, at least that day...

DON'T PROVOKE ME!

Fun!

2007-12-02T17:04:08Z

I just wanna give (even more) hugs to kseenaa, astroflammante and tekiila. It was great seeing you again :D

Pizza with friends... It's so nice :-)

And good luck with the thesis *holds thumbs*

They're Taking The Hobbits To Isengard

2007-12-02T11:46:08Z

I simply must share this one, just for the sake of it... And due to a skype coversation I had last night *giggles*...

Thanks for telling me the story of this guys...

And to my hard studying friends: Enjoy!

By Erwin Beekveld.

I will only say this:

!hobbits

OMG! People actually read this...

2007-11-11T19:04:08Z

I can not believe people actually read this journal. On IRC people have asked to friend me and some have asked about updates... Some have pointed out that they actually have read what I have written... And some even told me that it gave them some perspective on things...

I really don't know what makes this journal readable... and I'm still in chock... But anyways... Thanks for the kind words!

To all the people from IRC I would like to say:
Hi you guys and gals! I really enjoy hanging out with you in the channel (otherwise I wouldn't come back would I?). *smiles*

And I would do shameless commercial for you if it wasn't for the fact that my ex can read this (he is a computer geek too). I don't want him ruining all my fun so...

And yes, I have started to get my writing skills back after one and a half year of total lack of creativity. I write new stuff. The problem is that I am afraid it is to revealing of myself. I am a social being that are affected by other people, and writing about what you feel towards other is perhaps the most revealing thing you can write. Not to say that it can be revealing about others, and that really is a "no, no" for me on the net so...

I'm working on getting around those in my texts atm... I will get it right someday I hope...

Stuffed what???

2007-11-03T22:33:39Z

Ok... This is just to weird not to post. As some of you may know I like stuffed animals, specially teddy bears. But this is something new:

Why don't you give a stuffed virus to someone special.

Or was that to someone you don't like?

Well I definitly don't have one of those... But I did see they have the kissing disease...

Icons, icons, icons!

2007-11-02T20:30:50Z

Someone requested my Icons. Well, what do you know... I have uploaded them all to my website: Hedwig Is Dreaming. Just click on "Images" and you got my entire gallery of them.

Comment down below and please follow the guidelines stated at the site.

And a thanks to Ziphoid for making the my TabelGen php-script working. It really helped when creating an Icon gallery :D

Progress on diffrent areas and other thoughts...

2007-10-07T18:05:37Z

Computer geek side... Progress yes... Added several to my contact list... Both just nice to talk to persons and single computer geeks ;-)

Now I'm just doubting if this was a good idea... Or rather: How much of a mess will this get me into???

Life other than that is... well.. Still haven't gotten my 3 room apartment in order. I don't know if it is me that's lazy or if it is the fact that I work all the time, or the lack of furniture in the living room. And do mean it. It completely empty. I need to go to IKEA. But I don't have a car and, I'm sort of going on a trip soon. Perhaps after that I will go and check out sofas and stuff some weekend... By bus... Not to mention being sick for the last couple of days didn't help.

Some of you have mentioned facebook to me. Yeah, I'm sort of split on what to think about that. Yes it would be a nice way to keep in touch with new and old friends. The thing that bothers me is, well, I have some coworkers there too. And really, I hold a rather uncontroversial profile at work and don't tell them things I might get trouble with one way or the other. My sexual orientation is one of those things. And private... You know me ;-)... I a bit different. Mixing those two might not give a good result... And I would rather be myself then some "lame halfway compromise to make noone suspect the true nature of me" on my spare time...

Not to mention things could get complicated if... someone... joined... Hard to explain without being to specific...

I'll keep thinking thou...

An update on nerds...

2007-09-28T19:08:54Z

Hm... So I found this article on SvD... read it here (swedish)... It turns out I'm on the wrong side of the Atlantic ocean... Dang!

Anyways... I found the computer geek hiding place... IRC... I started talking to some there... One informed me that geeks are not that outspoken and have a low self esteem... testing this theory on other seems to confirm it...

This might cause problems... Hm...

And I did find some interesting stuff... but I'll keep 'em to myself for now... ;-)

Some random rambeling reasoning...

2007-09-19T18:34:14Z

I have reason to believe that it may very well be so that I am attracted to nerds... (I will not swear on it... I may change ;-) )

Do to my history in relationships and unanswered crushes it seem reasonable...
Library nerds (Or is it geeks...? I that case, ad geeks)
Computer nerds... (I guess you could see them as geeks too... Yes... ad geeks)
more computer nerds...

Anyways... So I'm single, right?

Where on earth do you find single nerds (and geeks)? I know that at least computer nerds sit at home staring at the computer...

(Yeah I have taken Ipren today and in my world... that's heavy stuff... gives me bad sense of humor...) *Giggles away to the kitchen*

So...

2007-07-04T21:40:58Z

Did I mention I cut my hair...

It is much shorter now... Before it was about one decimeter from my waist... and now it is from little over my shoulder and up... in different lengths so to speak... can still get it up in a ponytail thou... A little corny ponytail... but still...

Yeah and it does look so much nicer now...

And the bus driver still ask me if I want a whole och half ticket... Thank you so very much... I TURN 24 THIS SUMMER!!! You stop riding on half a ticket when you are 16... :|

And yet another apartment I didn't like...

Hopelessness comes to mind... Friends know why... I feel too alone in this world... really... It sucks...

Well... soon enough it will be work again... I would like to say "Thank God!"... But would it be to go to far?

Let's make this official then...

2007-05-07T20:10:22Z

I got a new job. A good job. With good pay. I am going to be first economist/informant of one of the administrative offices in the local municipality. A maternity leave... but still... What do you think will happen after at least one year as first economist? Can they really bug me about not having any work experience then? And will the pension overloaded local municipality want me to leave after one year?

The possibilities is endless, the hope for the future is bright... And I am sooo happy... And it really seems like a fun, versatile and qualified work...

This means I can finally begin the search for a new apartment... This might take a while though... I won't settle for the first available... I want a home, not a sleeping place... A home for me... Where might this be?

And some other good news is that my bf is likely to get summer job in his local municipality. This is many miles away thou... But I am happy for him, I really am... I just wish it would have been closer...

A note... and the meme...

2007-04-20T16:06:43Z

Because kseenaa made me do it...

Comment and I will:
1 - Tell you why I friended you.
2 - Associate you with a song/film.
3 - Tell a random fact about you.
4 - Tell a first memory about you.
5 - Associate you with a character/pairing.
6 - Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
7 - Tell you my favorite user pic of yours [if it pertains].
8 - In retort, you must spread this disease in your LJ.

I'm working on a real entry...

Just a note:
I need new social acquaintance... Everyone I know and just to know seem to have disappeared in different directions... Including my bf... He has found a practical training place in Jönköping so he's not here on the weekdays... and is apparently to tired to visit this weekend... SO... I have four walls... a ceiling and a flor to stare at... I beginning to hate that... Need to clean... but it's kind of boring... I could go out... alone... Maybe I'll go visit mom...

Where do you find new friends anyways? I had no trouble at the Student Union... But I am no student anymore... and from what I have heard it is kind of dead... The things I used to like anyways....

So any ideas?

What do you think of my new layout btw?

Guess what...

2006-12-21T19:27:20Z

I got a job... as of this monday I acctually work and get paid for it... WEEE!!! It's only for three months... but hey... It's a job... And I got another interview soon so... I'm hoping...

And here's the thing... (If you voted for the sitting government I suggest you read this closely):
I got this job ONLY because of the fact that I have had three months of practical training there as an unemployed youth. After three months the decided that they liked me and wanted to have me there during the introduction of a new system. They wouldn't have hired anyone if I haden't been there and showed them what I could do. They wouldn't have hired me if I just had asked them to. NO. My practical training was the reason they hired me... And thanks to the new government, not many if any will have this oppertunity during the next four years... Lets give a warm hand to you for taking away other peoples chance of getting a job... WELL DONE!!! (Irony inserted in the last two sentences if anyone missed that) Not to talk of everything else you have managed in the three months of your ruling... I won't even get started on that...

As for it only being three months... It's the local municipality... Yeah... they don't budget these sort of things... Me... they happened to have some money over due to some factors and decided I was worth it... But only enough for three months...

Well there you have my big news at the moment... I probably could rant some more but I really should be packing, packaging, and stuff... so I guess the only thing left to say is:

Merry Christmas you all, and to all a good night...

Userpics are weird...

2006-09-04T20:22:34Z

Ok... seriously... There is something very wrong with my userpics... the standard, is not always posted when I don't chose... and it keeps changing... I chose one and another one is posted...

What is wrong with this thing...

My first batch of icons...

2006-08-18T22:46:01Z

It's my first try at icons so do be kind. This is what I do when I'm bored ;)

These are some icons I've done over the last six month... That's a long time and I must say I have evolved more skill and better knowledge of the program during this time. So the earlier ones are not that great, and most of them is a result of testing diffrent things. But I will include them incase someone is intressted and for feedback.

1-27: Arwen
28-44: Anime
45-49: Misc
50-55: Friends fandoms

Teasers:

Rules for usage:

Comment if you take - I want to know which ones I got right
Credit hedwig_dreams
DO NOT HOTLINK
Enjoy

Arwen icons, mostly entries in arwen_stills:
1.   2.    3.

4.   5.   6.

7.   8. 9.

10.   11.   12.

13.   14.   15.

16.   17.   18.

19.   20.   21.

22.   23.   24.

25.   26.   27.

Anime icons, icons 35-44 from the film "Spirited away":
28.   29.   30.

31.   32.   33.

34.   35.   36.

37.   38.   39.

40.   41.   42.

43.   44.

Misc:
45.   46.   47.

48.   49.

Icons inspired by my friends fandoms. I only have one at the moment, so I borowed yours ;):
(I won't mind if you don't take, just needed pictures to play around with and test things)
50.   51.   52.

53.   54.   55.

Enjoy :)

Resource listing

2006-08-11T19:43:45Z

Since I have started doing icons and other things, some posted and others maybe posted in the future I thought I better start a resource listing to give proper credit. I will add more as I go along...

Resources for Photoshop: (mostly using different brushes)
_joni
77words
arisubox
cdg
colorset
dactyliotheca
daisukicons
eggdrpsoup
ownthesunshine
ildolce_icon
iiokua
illegitima
like_to_be_free
masquerade_arts
meleada
miggy
lemonrocket
mutsie_brushes
paine_09
endlessdeep
sinecure
spikesbint
neke
wonderland__
yumei_k
Arwen-Undomiel.com
Braggadocio
Miss M Brushes
`spiritsighs
*exitparis
*luciferous-glow
~alterna666
~crashdowngrrl-stock
~daughterofsnape
~ElavielEvenstar
~gotthard
~gfx-elfe
~grimmrabbit
~in-vogue
~kissncontrol/
~luana
~luxbella
~MonkWanderer
~Mithril55
~oneserenityone
~orchidee
~Pfefferminzchen - Rainharbour
~Rauvinne
~Skim89
~solenero73
~yu-resource
^kuschelirmel
=digital-amphetamine
=pureanodyne
=sanami276
=Scully7491
=yasny-chan

I have tried to get all, but some I just can't figure out where I got. So if you know something that should be here, just let me know.

Degree/Diploma certificate

2006-07-02T23:17:00Z

Without going through too much of what I have done all spring (mostly thesis work)... As of this Friday I have a degree/diploma certificate that says I have a:

Master of Science with a major in Business Administration with a specialisation in Organisation and Management

That I think is pretty nice...

Oh, I'm currently unemployed so if any of you happen to know anyone who need a management accountant or someone who just knows economics, just send me a message...

Still... I got my Masters and I am happy for it so... *SMILES*...

hmm... that was...

2006-03-19T21:09:08Z

I think i actually had one of the strangest and most hilarious nights at the student union pub on friday... Besides my boyfriend I brought a new friend from school... she and I have been working hard the last weeks on a group assignment wanted to celebrate that the whole thing was over and the old student that she is, wanted to relive the pub and see if it had changed...

What really happen that night I'm not exactly sure... I remember at on time going to the bar, talking to kseenaas boyfriend, saying "Don't know if I'm should get drunk or sober up". And no I don't usually drink alcohol and this night was no exception. The only thing I had was two coca cola (which was bad enough since I go hyper). And for the record my bf spilled rather early in the night what text was on my all to famous t-shirt. She didn't seem to even blink. Still I wonder if she got the fact that I am bisexual or if she just don't give a damn.

This night turned weirder when two unknown guys turned up at our table. They where drunk and the where as she put it "blonds" or idiots you may say. Both apperently not single thou no gf in sight. They where the "normal" kind, meaning everyone different then them was not normal to them. They started discussing homosexuality. When the discussion turned bisexuality, I couldn't take it anymore, got up and walked off...

and still... the evening ended with me being invited to the dance flor by her to dance with her and another guy... my bf don't dance so he stayed behind watching...

I'm confused...

hedwig_dreams @ 2006-02-20T23:22:00

2006-02-20T22:20:04Z

Just got this from my boyfriend...

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Hanna!

A thimbleful of Hanna would weigh over 100 million tons!
Hanna is the last letter of the Greek alphabet.
Hanna will often rub up against people to lay her scent and mark her territory.
Without Hanna, we would have to pollinate apple trees by hand.
Only one person in two billion will live to be Hanna!
Only 55 percent of Americans know that the sun is made of Hanna!
An average beaver can cut down Hanna every year.
In Eastern Africa you can buy beer brewed from Hanna.
By tradition, a girl standing under Hanna cannot refuse to be kissed by anyone who claims the privilege.
It can take Hanna several days to move just through one tree.

What the...?

My Johari Window

2006-02-20T19:29:04Z

Godiz told me... My Johari Window

Website update

2006-01-18T00:04:12Z

so I finaly pulled mysefl togheter and put up my new website. It still lacks a few things like a stop button for the music. But still... If you whant to see just follow link to Hedwig Is Dreaming (a few thing to bare in mind: in Swedish, has music (potentally a modem hazard) and not finished)

Please note that old bookmarks won't work. I have located it on a diffrent server, but my webhop still works. Another thing that will need fixing.

Oh... feel free to comment... just a first version to work with...

And I have to get back later with how my life has gone over the last month... but i don't really feel like it right now...

tell me...

2005-12-08T17:58:09Z

Why is packing a pain in the as only if it's just for four days...???
And why does everything fuck up right now... ang why did it have to be Tommy Körberg? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....

wondering...

2005-11-22T23:50:57Z

What do you do if you run out of dreams?